The formula will be untampered with and the success will be repeated a second, a third and sometimes even a fourth time. Once or twice a decade an act will burst through with a Number One that hits a national nerve and the public’s appetite for the sound and packaging will not be satisfied with the one record.Of course there are those artists that have worked long and hard building personal artistic confidence, critical acclaim, a loyal following (all strong foundations) and then have a Number One, that is that crowning glory. What can be achieved when no great financial rewards or long term career prospects allowing for creative freedom can be hoped for, let alone guaranteed? If this book succeeds in becoming Bert Weedon’s “Play In A Day” for some lost month in the late eighties we will be happy. Follow this simple step by step guide: Firstly, you must be skint and on the dole.
It is you, though, who will be responsible for bringing back those lost tastes, smells, tears, pangs, forgotten years and missed chances. People equate a Number One with fame, endless wealth and easy sex – a myth that they want to believe and one that the popular press want to see continued.
In years to come people will stagger home down lonely streets singing your song to the strains of regurgitated vindaloo, all memory of who was behind the song lost.
THE FOREVER ANCIENTS LIBERATION LOOPHOLE KLF PUBLICATIONS, BOX 283, HP22 5BW KLF PUBLICATIONS IS A KLF COMMUNl CATIONS COMPANY KLF COMMUNICATIONS 1988 FIRST PUBUSHED 1988 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
They continue to view the act’s cheaply recorded, debut blockbuster as striking gold and will spend the next few years pumping fortunes into studio time, video budgets and tour support whilst praying for a repeat of the miracle and the volume album sales that bring in the real money.
Watch Top of the Pops religiously every week and learn from it. YOU CAN BEGIN ANY SUNDAY EVENING You can begin any Sunday evening by listening to Bruno Brookes introducing the Top 40 Show between 4pm and 7pm.
You don’t have to sit down and dissect and study it, just have it on and make the tea. You just want something that’s not going to be offensive and people are going to be happy doing business with. Check that the company name that you have chosen is still sound. You are going to have to get used to getting up earlier; no lying in until noon now. The celebrated, of course, are apt to fall into a world of drugs, drink, broken marriages and bankruptcy but even this is given the glamour treatment instead of the squalid misery that it is in reality. The majority of Number One’s are achieved early on in the artist’s public career and before they have been able to establish reputations and build a solid fan base. Along with the soap stars, sporting heroes and selected (however distant) members of the Royal Family, pop stars belong to a glittering world of showbiz parties, at one end of the scale, to illicit liaisons, at the other, where their lives are dragged up, dressed up, made up and ultimately destroyed.Spend the remainder of the morning amassing the rest of the tools you will need for the job in hand. A record player (the crappier the better as long as it actually works). A hard back note book and a fine point, black ball Pentel.Mass appeal records can always transcend any apparatus they are played on; the exp ensive set up is only for judging coffee table records. Copies of the latest in the series of “Now That’s What I Call Music” and “Hits” LPs. A couple of the most recent dance compilation LPs (“The Techno Sounds of Dagenham Volume Vl”, etc.). All the 7″ singles in your house that ever made the Top 5. Address your envelope to: Sylvia Calver, Morgan Grampian Plc, Royal Sovereign House, 40 Beresford Street, London SE18 6BQ (telephone 01-854-2200) with a cheque or postal order for £15.00. If you do not already have any of the above, or are unable to borrow them, then we are afraid you are going to have to spend some real cash.Sitting around tinkering with the Portastudio or musical gear (either ancient or modern) just complicates and distracts you from the main objective.