Does Gretchen Weiners have a point about the rules of feminism? So in your opinion, what are the rules about dating exes?They wholeheartedly believe that it's wrong, disrespectful, and if a friend did that to them, they'd never talk to that person again.
Here are a few rules to keep in mind when trying to figure out whether it makes sense to start something up with your ex boyfriend's bro.
Lots of people have told me unequivocally that they would never date a friend's ex.
While we strongly suggest realizing there are many, many other fish in the sea, if you absolutely see nothing wrong with this and/or cannot bear to refrain from dating this person, here are a few tips to make sure you keep your friend: Talk to your friend: Ideally, you know that at best this situation is uncomfortable, and it's your job to talk to your friend.
Your new partner (your friend's ex) should as well, but remember that they have broken up, while you and your friend are still "together." An explanation of how important your friendship is to you and a sincere acknowledgment of the awkwardness of the situation might help.
What won't be excused is dishonesty -- for example, making your friend believe it's "nothing serious" when it really is, or lying about where you really were on Friday night when you bailed on that group dinner.
This will destroy trust, and with it any chance of maintaining the friendship. There is probably a reason that your friend and the ex broke up in the first place, and over time your friend will most likely realize that.However, when you're in different camps, and a friend dates your ex (or vice versa), this can lead to big trouble -- anything from awkward social interactions to permanent rifts within groups of friends.While many would say the ideal solution is to avoid run-ins completely, in many cases it's just not possible, especially when there are overlapping friends, locations, and events.If you find yourself in this situation, you need to be prepared.(*A note here: Of course, there are varying degrees of gravity -- a former fling may be less of a big deal than a serious relationship, and if we're talking about a recent ex-husband or ex-wife and your friend, well, then, we'll go out on a limb and say that perhaps you should reconsider your friendship unless there is an extremely unique circumstance.) If you've found yourself facing this situation as the person whose friend and ex are now dating, here are a few tips on how to handle yourself with style and grace: Have a support system handy: It's nice to ask one or two close friends to help you out.If you've been through a breakup, divorce, or just haven't been able to find happiness in your love life, Bounce Back is a place to tell your story, get community support and expert advice, and find the confidence and strength you need to move forward.