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Objects Under This Shirt Are Larger Than They Appear Next Mood Swing: Six Seconds PMS Really Stands for Purchase More Shoes Menopause, Menstrual Cramps, Mental Illness - Have You Noticed That All of Our Problems Begin with Men? Your husband jokes thatinstead of buying a wood stove,he is using you to heat the family room this winter. If a messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, then my kitchen is delirious.

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If men can run the world,why can't they stop wearing neckties?

How intelligent is it to start the dayby tying a noose around your neck?

The following bit is a good example of the Seinfeld strategy:.

Louie, and other comedy greats, can deftly make an audience do two things: laugh and think.

"When people say they're looking for someone with a 'good' sense of humor, they mean a well-matched sense of humor," said Mc Graw.

"You shouldn't just have an arsenal of jokes that everyone finds funny.

That Claudia Schiffer must be a genius because I told a friend my plan to attain world peace, and he told me I have "Schiffer Brains." I love being married. Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words:"Don't pick that up,you don't know where it's been." If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen So many men, so few who can afford me Don't treat me any differently than you would the queen If they don't have chocolate in heaven, I'm not going!! One of life's mysteries is howa two pound box of candycan make a woman gain five pounds. The greatest discovery of any generation isthat a human being can alter his lifeby altering his attitude. I wish you a day of small miracles - A fresh pot of coffee you didn't make yourself.

It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certainthey are their own. You're on so much estrogenthat you take your Brownie troopon a field trip to Chippendales.

I was sitting on my own in a restaurant when I saw a beautiful woman at another table.

I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu.

By analyzing comedians doing what they do best, Mc Graw came up with a theory of humor he calls "Benign Violation Theory" (let's call it BVT).


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